When you’re a 19-year-old pop sensation, the world, it seems, is your oyster: girls throwing themselves at you 24/7, hit singles filling up the radio, and bundles of cash in the bank.
Nothing can stop you, you’re invincible! That is, of course, until you hit the high rollers’ roulette tables and dump a ton of cash.
That’s what happened to Harry Styles recently, dimple-cheeked, floppy-haired heartthrob from top boy band One Direction. The young star was pictured stacking off thousands on the spin of a wheel in the VIP room at Perth’s Pearl Room Casino. Ouch.
Word is that Harry has a serious liking for the game, but on this occasion even his favourite number, 17 Black, couldn’t save him from a drubbing from his manager. Why? Because the only people smiling after his massive losing streak were the casino owners.
So, what advice should we at OnlineCasino.com.au give him? Should Harry quit gambling once and for all?
Actually, what he should do is stop hanging out in high roller casinos and instead sign up with an online site. Why? Here are five ways the baby-faced millionaire could save a few bucks in future.
1) THE LIMITS ARE LOWER ONLINE
Rather than trying to mix it with the sharp-suited sharks and hustlers of Perth’s swankiest VIP gambling joint, Harry should switch gears and just sign up with an online casino. Then he could learn a little bankroll management and drop his stakes down a notch or two or 30. Most top Aussie online casinos offer roulette online starting at just a few cents. The girls will still love you even if you’re not dropping piles of bills, Harry!
2) THERE ARE HEAPS OF DIFFERENT GAMES
Why play roulette when you can get much better odds elsewhere? Roulette offers the worst house edge (or best if you’re a casino owner reading this) and for American Roulette – with its double zeros – an even WORSE house edge. Online, blackjack offers the best odds for players and for getting a blackjack (eg. A-K, A-Q) you’ll win 3:2 your money.
Remember, the object of Blackjack isn’t to get as near to 21 as possible, it’s merely to beat the dealer’s hand. As long as you do that, you win. And Harry, if you’re worried about looking cool, Frank Sinatra loved Blackjack, and he was the coolest cat around, right? So, do yourself a favour and get onto the Blackjack tables pronto.
Sorry, Harry, what’s that? You really love Roulette and want to play online? OK, fair enough, mate. The great thing about online roulette is that it has many variations: there’s European, American, Multi-Ball (featuring several balls on the go at the same time) and Multi-table roulette (allowing you to play up to eight tables at once). What’s better, because it’s online, you won’t have to wait for a seat at a table, unlike that high roller joint you were snapped in where there were about five waiting in front of you.
3) THE PAYOUTS ARE BETTER ONLINE – FACT!
Because online casinos don’t have the overheads that live casinos do – no lights, floor space or staff – they’re able to offer punters better percentages on their wins. The slots are more generous, the table games better, and you won’t have to worry about any discrepancies with random dealing when playing online – all games, especially roulette, are governed by strictly-audited RNGs (Random Number Generators) so everything is above board and 100% legitim…..Harry? Harry? Put that comb down mate, we promise we won’t talk about RNGs again.
4) YOU CAN BAG A GREAT WELCOME BONUS
When you’re on the road, you don’t really have time to sign up for a big welcome VIP scheme at a land-based casino. After all, once your tour is over, you’ll be out of that city, and you may not be back for months. That’s not really gonna cut it, is it?
Well, at an online casino, you can get yourself a top welcome bonus on your first deposit, maybe something as big as 200% up to $2000! It’s a great way of offsetting some of those losses on 17 Black, and anyway, with your big money gambling you’ll unlock it in no time.
5) PLAY ON YOUR MOBILE, ON THE ROAD, ANY TIME
When you’re on the road, in between making hordes of girls go weak at the knees, you can fill in the time by gambling online. You can enjoy top casino games right on your mobile phone. While the rest of your band mates are murdering harmonies further down the bus, you can deal a few hands or spin some wheels.
One final point, Harry: the best feature of online casinos is that they offer play-money versions of their top games like roulette and blackjack. That way, you can practise for free without the risk of losing a cent. The practise tables are perfect for honing your roulette strategy, so the next time you decide to mix it with the big boys at the VIP rooms you won’t be out of your depth.